Meat-Flavoured Chips of the World, Reviewed! – Ruffles Hot Wings

Today’s Special: Hot Wings (Ruffles Brand)

As a picky eater, I generally find actual wings to be too much work for too little gain. I’ve been known to eat fries dipped in delicious wing sauce more often than I’ve eaten the actual wings. By extension, these ‘Hot Wings’ chips should be perfect for someone like me, and really, they aren’t bad. In fact, they are pretty good.

The chips are thick cut, but not so covered in seasonings that you get the same mess effect as eating actual wings. They have a little bit of a kick, and the seasoning mix tastes a bit like some commercially available barbeque sauces. They are satisfying as a chip. However – and for a review like this one, hugely important – they don’t taste very much like chicken.

In the interest of comparison, I also sampled (read: ate a huge-ass bag of, while watching a ‘Criminal Minds’ marathon) Sensations…. They make no claim to meatiness, but total claim to barbeque-y goodness.

I expect futuristic perfection from my meat chips. I want synthesis! We all know that the flavour of these chips probably comes from a bottle anyway, manufactured at some food-perfume factory, so I think it is reasonable to expect a solid simulation of the real deal. My problem with wings (as stated previously) is also my problem with laziness. Meat chips should circumvent that for me. After all, chips are the laziest food, and I am an optimist.

End result: 3 stars out of 5 (-2 for lack of meatiness)

Ed. Note: The folks at Taquitos.net (located just around the corner of the dancing hotdog .gif in the Hinternet) agree with the lack of chicken flavour. Quality reviewing, all around.

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About Kid-Scissor Hybrid

Online zine of technology + humanity with stories both real and fictional. Celebrating and fearing the inevitable!

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